Plymouth Harbor resident and her siblings honor parents

Carol Siegler and her siblings put their parents' lives into perspective, as they craft a memoir of Charlie and Wilma Shapiro.

By Amanda Sebastiano
| 6:00 a.m. July 15, 2015

Siblings Jeffrey Shapiro, 95, Carol Siegler, 89, Jeffrey and Dorothy Tanebaum, 95, for the first time in more than five years came together for a few days June 26, to help craft a memoir for their parents.

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Making memories

After her grandmother, Mildred, died, Elizabeth Huntoon Coursen wished she had a tangible way to remember her.

Coursen, a local author and publisher, has since helped many individuals publish their own autobiographies, memoirs and family histories.

Coursen starts her discussions with the things she wished she had asked her own relatives.

"I always think, “Why didn't I or someone in my family sit down with Grandma and write down those stories she'd tell us?’” Coursen said.

For those interested in writing their memoir or family history, Coursen recommends deciding first what life lessons and stories they want to include.

The goal of most memoirs is to determine "what kind of people" make up the family tree and what lessons the individual learned from their life experiences.

She asks her clients to fill out life questionnaires, which ask pages of questions — such as how, when and where the person's parents met — and to describe their personalities.

Coursen recommends keeping a notebook nearby at all times, even when you're asleep, so you don't forget the thought by morning.

Conversations about difficult decisions and hardships often lead to the best stories, she said.

"I want to hear about changes — horse-to-car, train-to-plane types of things," Coursen said. "Memoirs are slices of life, and the things that were important tell a lot about a person and how they handled the situation."

Coursen recommends talking with family members about their lives and taking note of memorable moments as soon as possible.

Coursen suggests using road trips and quiet moments to ask family members questions.

"There is no time soon enough to have these conversations," Coursen said. "It's a tragedy to have a piece of history with no story. Without a story, stuff is just stuff. Stuff with a story is priceless."

Charlie Shapiro was a Lithuanian immigrant with a mind for business even though he never graduated high school.

Wilma Shapiro had a bohemian spirit and was born to a family with multigenerational roots in Brooklyn, N.Y.

The couple's children — Carol Siegler, 89, Jeffrey Shapiro, 94, and Dorothy Tanenbaum, 95 — still vividly remember details about their parents, such as their father's generosity and the way their mother's Spanish accent sounded more like Chinese dialect.

“Remember how Mother would sound?” Shapiro asked his sisters when they gathered at Siegler’s Plymouth Harbor home recently. “But what a woman she was. She lived life the way she wanted to.”

Charlie Shapiro died in 1984, and Wilma Shapiro died in 1992. Now the siblings are working to make sure their parents’ story lives on even after their own memories fade.

Elizabeth Huntoon Coursen, a local editor and publisher, is helping them publish the book, which the siblings hope to release in November. Its unofficial title is “A Match Made in Heaven,” and will recount highlights of the couple’s life in Cuba and the struggles of raising a family amid the country’s instability that included Fidel Castro’s takeover in the late 1950s.

A few weeks ago, the siblings gathered around the living room of Siegler’s Plymouth Harbor home and shared their fondest memories of their parents.

“We’re proud to be their children, and we want to tell their story,” Jeffrey Shapiro said.

Dynamic duo

Charlie Shapiro immigrated to the United States in the 1890s with his family.

He and Wilma met at a party thrown by a mutual friend. By 1925, they were married and had three children.

“It was love at first sight, I’d guess,” Siegler said. “They always loved each other.”

A pioneer in the textile industry, Charlie Shapiro first traveled to Cuba in 1915 to collect money vendors there owed him.

Their parents dealt with the chaotic events of the World War II era and numerous Cuban revolutions by helping those in need, Siegler recalled.

For example, Wilma Shapiro and other women from the Jewish community coordinated efforts to provide European refugees with food, clothing and other items when they arrived in Tiscornia.

Both Wilma and Charlie Shapiro gave refugees business opportunities in an effort to help them earn money in Cuba.

Charlie Shapiro would never leave his businesses, which included his Havana department store, Los Precios Fijos, even during the initial unrest of the Cuban Revolution.

It wasn't until Castro's soldiers confiscated Los Precios Fijos that the Shapiros fled Cuba — closing a chapter of the family's history.

Rough drafts

Charlie Shapiro later wrote five condensed versions of his life story but never completed a version that satisfied him.

“He’d remember something important that he forgot to include, and he’d scrap the previous copy and completely rewrite the story,” Siegler said.

Five years ago, Siegler spearhead the project of completing the story and asked her siblings to help.

Although her brother returned to Miami and her sister returned to Texas after the three-day visit in June, Siegler continues sorting through family photos tucked away in cardboard boxes stacked nearly to the ceiling in the shower of her guest bathroom.

"It's a lot of work, but the three of us all have such admiration for our parents," Siegler said with tears in her eyes. "They were unusual people — a strong devoted couple who shared with others. Their merit of life is something we want to share. I think they'd like this version, and I hope the story of their life's journey will inspire others."

Contact Amanda Sebastiano at [email protected].