APRIL FOOLS: Swans and geese get their own GMD crosswalk

Because webbed feet work great in water but not so great on asphalt, a bird-loving benefactor has donated the money necessary to convert one of Longboat Key’s on-demand crosswalks into a cross-waddle for swans and geese.

Workers from Florida Department of Transportation this week added more avian-appropriate apparatus to the existing signs, flashing lights and pedestrian push buttons.

Now, when swans or geese care to visit friends on the opposite side of Longboat’s thoroughfare, all they need do is bop the silver button with their beaks to start the lights flashing and the traffic stopping. Similar to instructions proffered at the time of the pedestrian crosswalk installation, the birds are urged to: "push the button and wait a few moments and look both ways. Don’t cross until motorists are stopping to allow you to cross the road.''

Town police say the same laws governing conventional crosswalks will apply to the birds’ version.  Penalties in Florida range from $500 for a simple violation to much higher if injuries are involved.

“I’ve seen so many close-calls, it’s made my heart stop – nearly ,’’ said winter visitor Otto Bawn after the project was completed. “So, it’s a problem and I can fix it with a few thousand dollars. It’s not like my kids would appreciate it, anyway.’’

The work to replace two signs and modify the buttons cost about $7,000.

A proclamation from Town Hall thanks Bawn for his generosity and respect for the island’s wildlife.

Much like their human counterparts, Canada geese are frequent visitors to Longboat Key, and don’t always know the way around.  They have created a nuisance in years past, stopping traffic when jaywalking across Gulf of Mexico Drive.

Swan mating pairs frequently move from one Longboat Key Club golf course to the other, requiring assistance to find their way. With the addition of the cross-waddle, town officials hope the swans can date and mate on their own, from one side of the road to the other.

Town leaders say there is no way to estimate how long it might take island motorists to become accustomed to the converted crosswalk and the birds that are using it. "I'm not sure they're accustomed to the people crosswalks, yet,'' Officer Joe Friday said,