East Manatee church members will go through bars to spread Christmas joy

Pastor Phil Derstine is a gentle-mannered, soft spoken man, who feels just as comfortable walking into a biker bar as he does standing behind the pulpit.

He’s been leading his parishioners at East County's The Family Church into bars for over 35 years.

It’s a Christmas Eve tradition.

They don’t go to drink or to recruit new church members. They go Christmas caroling.

“There are people who don’t have families, who are hurting and lonely, and who have problems with holidays,” Derstine said. “I’ve found that bars are like churches. People go there for fellowship, and bartenders are a lot like pastors. They know what nights their people come, and they know them by name and offer counsel.”

For those church members brave enough to walk into a dive bar and start singing “Jingle Bells” in front of an often apprehensive crowd, there’s camaraderie to be found.

Church member Nancy Pilato said the last time she went caroling, her group ended up at Denny’s at 3 a.m. sharing stories from the evening. She plans on napping Christmas Eve day to prepare for the late night.

The caroling typically ends at midnight because the church members have a big day ahead and many have presents to wrap for little ones. They take time away from their families to go caroling because “it’s the right thing to do,” Derstine said. 

Photo by Lesley Dwyer

In over 35 years, church members have only had one bar refuse to let them sing, but they've been heckled on more than one occasion. 

The carolers split into four groups to cover the whole county. Any bar that’s open, they ask to carol. 

“Jingle Bells” is always the opening number because the crowd can sing along. Derstine remembered one time when a burly-looking biker shouted out, “Come on, sing about Jesus. We know why you’re here.” 

The biker didn’t know that would only bring Derstine closer to him.

“He was mine. I couldn’t wait to get off the stage and talk to him,” Derstine said. “I walked up to him and he said, ‘You’re not afraid of us, are you?’ I said, ‘No.’ And he said, ‘Let me tell you, most of the people in here are afraid of you.’” 

On the other side of skepticism are the people who gravitate toward the carolers and ask for one more song or a prayer. 

One gentleman begged for two more songs, but the bar had resumed its regular activities and the music was already blasting from the speakers. He talked the owner into turning the music off again. 

Derstine saw the man was crying and approached him after the carols. He'd lost his wife a few months earlier. 

Music is a universal language. 

When the carolers stepped into an all Hispanic bar, they scrapped their usual playlist and sang "Feliz Navidad."

“We sang that over and over and over again,” Derstine said. “We didn’t even know the Spanish part of it, just the Feliz Navidad part of it, but everyone was singing and dancing and they carried us through the part we didn’t know.”

Church members hand out song books that come with scripture and a piece of chocolate, but nothing is forced so the bars welcome and expect them now. 

One bartender told Derstine last year that he was late. Derstine laughed and said, “We don’t have a gig.” 

Pilato noted that the group also ends up giving out a lot of hugs. 

“All people want is love,” she said. “Love is lacking so deeply. After a while, people put their shields up, but if you put your arm around them and hug them, they just melt.”