Since it takes two to make a baby, we should consider that it helps to have two take care of that child.
For those who have been raised by a single parent or who are a single parent you know how difficult it is on the parent and the child if there is only one parent involved.
Deanna Keeling, Course Facilitator with Certevia Inc., reminds us to focus on the child and not on any remaining baggage you have with your ex-spouse. Your child’s future depends on how you handle this new chapter in your life. Children are harmed when they hear a parent say bad things about the other parent or when they hear any other family member or friend of their parents say anything bad about their other parent. Children do not miss a thing!
The philosophy of co-parenting allows both parents to be equally involved in their child’s life. It’s incumbent upon each of us to develop relationships with their friends, teachers, coaches and centers of influence and not abdicate that responsibility to the other parent.
The sad truth is that sometimes separation and divorce cause us to be better parents. Either way, be involved, be present. Your child needs you even more right now that their world is changing.
They are only young for a short time and they need your undivided attention, your encouragement, your guidance and discipline. It is normal to feel lonely and hurt from a divorce, but often your children feel the same and remember, you are the adult.
You will always be a family! It may sound weird, but you will always be mother, father and children. What if as part of the breaking up of your family, you started a new tradition? Maybe you create your family day, where your family comes together and celebrates as a family. It doesn’t have to be a formal holiday, but it can be special for your family. One thing most kids likely want is time to remember the fond parts of their life as a child.
Create time every week to check with the other parent to discuss any issues that need to be addressed regarding your children. They will be delighted to know that their parents are taking time to talk about them. Our children really need to know that they are so important that we are able to put our own issues aside in order to focus on them. As children get older and have more school work and activities, it is imperative for us to stay connected to what is going on. Take the extra time to set a schedule. Creating good co-parenting habits will help everyone and will benefit your children immensely.
RECOMMENDED PARENTING COURSE:
Certevia at Holiday Inn Express (Gantt Rd) taught by Deanna Keeling.
Freya Robbins, CDFA™
Family & Divorce Mediation | Elder Care Mediation
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