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Theater review: 'Hands on a Hardbody'

Keep on Trucking.


"Hands on a Hardbody" runs through March 6. Photo by Cliff Roles.
"Hands on a Hardbody" runs through March 6. Photo by Cliff Roles.
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“Hands on a Hardbody,” offers an all-American tale of desperation, desire, competition and consumerism at The Players. It’s an adaptation of S. R. Bindler’s 1997 documentary about a competition in Longview, Texas. In case you missed it …

The prize was a shiny, new, 1997 Nissan “hardbody” pickup truck. To win it, contestants had to stay on their feet and keep at least one gloved hand on said truck, which was parked outside the air-conditioned showroom under the hot Texas sun. Aside from regular bathroom and water breaks, contestants had to continuously touch it without leaning or squatting. The last man (or woman) standing won it.

“Now in Russia, they got it mapped out so that everyone pulls for everyone else — that’s the theory, anyway. But what I know about is Texas. And down here ... you’re on your own.”

—from Joel and Ethan Coen’s “Blood Simple”

That seems like unlikely source material for a musical — which usually involves people dancing around and not staying put. But there’s a truckload of talent behind this adaptation. Doug Wright wrote the book. (The versatile writer behind the screenplay for the sadistic “Quills” and the bouncy book for “Little Mermaid.”) Phish frontman (or “phrontman”) Trey Anastasio created the hard-driving, alt-country tunes with his longtime collaborator, lyricist Amanda Green.

Like the original documentary, the musical adaptation is primarily a character study of the contestants and the shady dealer exploiting them. To the 10 contestants, the Nissan Frontier is the American Dream on wheels. The dream’s details depend on the dreamer.

Benny (John Andruzzi), a boastful, trash-talking former contest winner, wants to rekindle his self-respect. The 60-something J.D. (Ric Stroup), fell off an oil rig, wrecked his leg and lost his job; driving home the $22,000 truck will make him a provider again. Jesus (Joe Wolf) is a Mexican-American — born in the U.S.A., but constantly mistaken for an illegal immigrant; he dreams of being veterinarian. The born-again Norma prays for a victory so she can drive her kids to school. Greg (Ross Boehringer) wants to be a Hollywood stuntman. Kelli (Jennifer Baker) is a UPS worker who’d love to drive there with him. Iraq War I veteran Chris (John Wyczlinski) seems to be looking for another battle to fight. Ex-cheerleader Heather (Asia Dekle) fights to win, by fair means or foul. Ronald (Eldred Brown) seeks an excuse to kick his addiction to Snickers; Janis (Lucy Malacos) is a trailer park matriarch who wants decent transportation for her hard-working husband, Don, (Jay Bowman) who cheers her on from the sidelines the whole time. J.D.’s wife Virginia (Riselle Bain) finally goes home; she’s sure the gig will put J.D. back in the hospital. These competitors form alliance or try to psyche each other out. One by one, they fall. Behind the scenes, Dealer Mike (Timothy Fitzgerald) hopes this publicity stunt will help him hold onto his dealership and will happily cheat to give the contest a dramatic arc. Cindy (Ruth Shaulis) foresees his downfall.

"Hands on a Hardbody" runs through March 6. Photo by Cliff Roles.
"Hands on a Hardbody" runs through March 6. Photo by Cliff Roles.

It’s a fun show. Director Michael Newton-Brown puts the pedal to the metal and takes the audience for a rocking ride. The actors deliver great performances. Their singing is a tad uneven, but they’re backed up by musical director Alan Corey’s sizzling five-piece rock band. Kaylene McCaw’s costumes express the hard-luck history of the characters. The musical get around the “staying put” dilemma by putting the truck on vast lazy Suzan, allowing for different points of view. (Newton-Brown also designed the sets.) When the characters have their various epiphanies, they take their hands of the truck and dance around and sing. (We understand they’re “really” touching the truck.”) Kudos to Kelly Burnette for the high-octane choreography.

At first glance, this musical seems like a direct descendent of “They Shoot Horses, Don’t They?”—a 1969 film about a hellish Depression-era dance marathon. But it isn’t.

“Hands on a Hardbody” has no problem with its all-American competition. Instead of moaning about exploitation, it gets you rooting for all of the contestants. You know there’ll be nine losers and one winner. But everybody’s fighting to win with everything they’ve got. They’re all winners, although it’s far better to be the winner who drives off with the truck. That’s the way it works in the U.S.A.

Especially down in Texas.

 

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