City and county: Why can’t we be friends?

APRIL FOOLS — The Hatfields and the McCoys. Full-time residents and snowbirds. Sarasota County and the city of Sarasota?

Although city and county commissioners have been embroiled in a years-long battle over myriad municipal issues, a recent friendship retreat ordered by a 12th Judicial Circuit Court judge appears to be soothing relations.

Although the week-long trip bridged relations between the two government bodies, a covert operation from an old nemesis raised the possibility of new Sunshine suits.

Judge Saul Goodman ordered a stay in pending litigation between the two government bodies over the former police station site in downtown Sarasota, and forced the two sides to attend Camp Beefsquash. The city and county will each tap their respective general funds to split the $400,000 price tag for the retreat.

The city’s refusal to convey the downtown property to the county, which the county contends it is owed based on a memorandum of understanding signed in 2003, is one of several issues creating a fracture between the municipalities. The city is also feuding with the county over an extension to the downtown CRA, solutions to the regions’ homelessness problem and park maintenance.

While those topics have been discussed during the wilderness retreat, the rancor that usually accompanies such discussions has faded. The two sets of commissioners found common ground in camp activities, including “Light as a Feather, Stiff as a Board,” s’mores roasting, softball, charades and the trading of scary campfire stories.

The consensus was the scariest story was about the ghost that haunts the elevator in the county administration building.

County Commissioner Paul Caragiulo, a former opera singer, used his booming tenor and acoustic guitar to lead both boards in renditions of “Take Me Home, Country Roads,” with specific references to Sarasota County Area Transit and road impact fees, “Kumbaya” and the Beach Boys’ “Wouldn’t It Be Nice?”  

A brief argument ensued, however, after city commissioners accused Caragiulo of guiding the Ouija board to favor county stances after the group asked spirits from beyond about the future of the CRA.

Despite the short tiff, camp shenanigans continued in a more positive light, with city officials spraying silly string at county leaders while chanting, “CRA! Fund our parks!” after lights-out. City Manager Tom Barwin and County Administrator Tom Harmer (nicknamed “Twin Toms”), who served as de facto camp counselors, quickly extinguished the fun because it was past 10 p.m.

At the same time, paralegal Michael Barfield and Sarasota attorney Andrea Mogensen paddled across Legaltrouble Lake from Camp Transparency for a raid on the city’s cottage. After spray-painting “CAYA shelter” on one of the walls, the pair, who have represented Citizens for Sunshine in a number of high-profile lawsuits against local governments, drafted a request for an injunction against the retreat and left it on the cabin floor — after putting shaving cream in the commissioners’ hands and tickling their faces with a feather.

The lawsuit, which is expected to be filed in the 12th Judicial Circuit Court and could cost the city thousands of dollars, didn’t stop Caragiulo from persuading Barfield and Mogensen to return for a barbecue the next day. Once again, breaking out his acoustic guitar, Caragiulo belted “Why Can’t We Be Friends?” on the final day of the retreat.

Hopefully you made it to the end of the article, so we can say, Happy April Fools' Day! This story is not true.